It is so very hard to tell someone "don't be afraid" when they are literally filled with fear and it cannot be shaken. I'll never forget the first time I was truly afraid....two words: Freddy Kruger. Still makes me cringe. Even though I knew it wasn't real I was still so scared and had to pray my way out of it in Jr. High. I do not watch scary movies anymore....EVER!
We are experiencing our first real fear with Braxton. It all started about a week ago while Steve and I were at a party and the boys were at home with a dear friend. Braxton caught the first 5 minutes of "The Grinch" with Jim Carey. The movie was turned off pretty quick with the realization that Mr. Carey is a bit frightening as the Grinch, especially at the beginning of the movie. All was fine until a few days later when the bad dreams started. Braxton has been dreaming about the Grinch for the past 4 nights. He goes to bed saying "I don't want to dream again." and "I'm afraid of the Grinch." He has come into our room in tears in the middle of the night for the past 4 nights. He does not let me out of his sight during the day and will not go into a dark room even in the daytime! He told Nash today, "Go in there and get my ball because I'm scared." Last night Steve and I finally gave in and let the little guy start off in the middle of us....great night sleep for Braxton, not so much for mom and dad! How safe he felt in the middle of us!!
It breaks my heart to see my boy so sad and so scared. We have prayed for him and with him. We have talked to him about how the Grinch is pretend and how it's just a costume. We have shown him pictures of Jim Carey without the costume, all smiles and looking nice. We have talked about how God does not want us to be afraid and how he is bigger than the Grinch. We have talked about how God sends his angels to watch over us. We have brainstormed things that make Braxton happy....marshmallows, mommy and daddy, cookies, Christmas lights, books, Nash, cartoons, friends, and so on. Steve and I have thought about sitting down as a family and watching The Grinch together from beginning to end to show Braxton that it has a happy ending. We are still thinking about that one. Any opinions?
God does not give us a spirit of fear, but it is hard for a 4 year old to grasp that. ...it's sometimes hard for a 31 year old to grasp that as well. We all have "Grinches" in our lives that we need to give up to God. We all have things that linger in our minds that make us afraid. Why is it so hard to just let go? I don't claim to have the answer to that, but as I told Braxton, when that Grinch comes in your mind say "GO AWAY GRINCH!" and ask God to help you think of happy things.
8 comments:
We had a similar experience with Maggie when we thought she was in bed but instead, she wandered downstairs and caught a frightening scene from ER and couldn't stop talking about it.
You are doing exactly what you should be by explaining it and praying about it.
I think that unfortunately...it just takes time.
Doesn't it break your heart, though, to literally watch your child loose his/her innocence. I felt so guilty for the longest time that a once clear and clean mind got poisoned and I should have prevented it.
Maybe take him to a different movie so he'll get preoccupied with different thoughts. Or let him watch the cartoon version so he can see that the once evil Grinch turns kind.
Good luck!
Sam hates the Jim Carey Grinch but LOVES the cartoon version. When he brings it up, he always says he wants to watch the good Grinch, not the bad one. It's much happier with a fun little song to boot. The boys have been walking around the past few weeks singing the happy little town song. Plus, the cartoon version is only 30 minutes or an hour as opposed to full movie length, so you get to the happy part quicker. I'd definately watch it all together the first time and talk it through.
Gabe calls him the Grunch.
Great idea to watch the cartoon version. Poor B, I'm sorry he's so scared.
Thanks girls! Yes, we have watched the cartoon Grinch a zillion times before the mean Grinch made himself known to us. B. loves the cartoon! He did better going to bed tonight...no mention of that green guy! :)
well, if he has forgotten now, then don't do it, but i would watch the whole movie together if it comes back up. maybe you could paint his and steve's face green and show him it's makeup...wouldn't that be fun to figure out how to do and then clean up?
do you have that veggie movie that has the song "God is bigger than the boogie man..."? it's catchy and just may work!
my boys could sing it backwards and forwards and recite all the no fear scriptures and were (and still are) big ole scaredy-cats. good luck my dear!
I agree with Stephanie! If you don't think he'll watch the whole thing, forward to the end, where the Grinch is the "good guy" and maybe he'll agree to watch it. Green faces sure would be fun! You're a great Mom, Katherine!
How funny- my mil let Gavin watch that when we were out of town the other weekend. She said it scared him but then he wouldn't let her turn it off. Now he asks to watch it but I stick with the cartoon grinch. Your kids are so cute. Thanks for the Christmas cards- glad you got them out! :-) Hope B gets over the Grinch dreams. I was laughing and reading frank you blog and he said he wants to call tomorrow and leave a message on your machine from the Grinch= but don't worry- He won't. Hope you guys have a great Christmas.
Miss you!
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